Comments on: My grandfather is gone http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/ Just another WordPress weblog Thu, 20 Nov 2008 09:06:16 +0000 http://wordpress.org/?v=2.6.2 By: Dad http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-8168 Dad Wed, 31 Oct 2007 20:46:19 +0000 http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-8168 Chris, It was a tough time for all of us those few days. You can be sure that Granpa loved you and your family very much. He enjoyed your visits and I always heard the stories of what the kids did to amuse him. I have feelings of guilt for not being around more too. He always had a project to work on or an idea for me to look at or work to do on the house, most recently the kitchen remodeling. It seems he wasn't happy unless some kind of construction work was going on in the house. You can still get to know more about him by talking to Grandma or me or your aunts. He was a private person and didn't talk about himself very often. He could be very strict and if you didn't follow his rules be prepared to pay the price. On the other hand if you were in need he would give you anything he had to help you out. It's been a little over 2 months since that night. Though my memories of those last few days will be with me forever, the memories of the rest of my time with him are coming forward and I feel I was blessed to have him as a Dad. We must go on and try to live our lives the way he raised us to. I am going to close this by saying to you that I love you and your family very much. Dad Chris,
It was a tough time for all of us those few days. You can be sure that Granpa loved you and your family very much. He enjoyed your visits and I always heard the stories of what the kids did to amuse him. I have feelings of guilt for not being around more too. He always had a project to work on or an idea for me to look at or work to do on the house, most recently the kitchen remodeling. It seems he wasn’t happy unless some kind of construction work was going on in the house.

You can still get to know more about him by talking to Grandma or me or your aunts. He was a private person and didn’t talk about himself very often. He could be very strict and if you didn’t follow his rules be prepared to pay the price. On the other hand if you were in need he would give you anything he had to help you out.

It’s been a little over 2 months since that night. Though my memories of those last few days will be with me forever, the memories of the rest of my time with him are coming forward and I feel I was blessed to have him as a Dad. We must go on and try to live our lives the way he raised us to.

I am going to close this by saying to you that I love you and your family very much.

Dad

]]> By: Melissa Wolbers http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7593 Melissa Wolbers Mon, 20 Aug 2007 18:59:37 +0000 http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7593 (co-worker/friend of Josh and Becca Thrap-in other words a perfect stranger to you) I'm sorry for you loss. I have to admit I started crying reading your writing/thoughts. Writing down and sharing your thoughts and grief is very good thearpy. Keep talking about your feelings, it helps so much. I lost my dad when I was 20 yrs old, oh gosh, 12 yrs already. I'm not going to sugar coat it, it hurts still, it hurts on every birthday, every holiday and every family event. It doesn't hurt as bad, but it still hurts. You may not think you can do or want to do anything, but you do, you push forward. You do it for your family members. You dry your tears and move forward, not only for yourself but for your family. Believe me, easier said than done, I know. I've never met you or your grandpa, but from what I've read you both sound like a great role model. Keep his stories(the ones he told and the experiences you had with him) alive and tell them to your kids. Stay strong. (co-worker/friend of Josh and Becca Thrap-in other words a perfect stranger to you)
I’m sorry for you loss. I have to admit I started crying reading your writing/thoughts. Writing down and sharing your thoughts and grief is very good thearpy. Keep talking about your feelings, it helps so much.
I lost my dad when I was 20 yrs old, oh gosh, 12 yrs already. I’m not going to sugar coat it, it hurts still, it hurts on every birthday, every holiday and every family event. It doesn’t hurt as bad, but it still hurts. You may not think you can do or want to do anything, but you do, you push forward. You do it for your family members. You dry your tears and move forward, not only for yourself but for your family. Believe me, easier said than done, I know. I’ve never met you or your grandpa, but from what I’ve read you both sound like a great role model. Keep his stories(the ones he told and the experiences you had with him) alive and tell them to your kids. Stay strong.

]]> By: Grandpa http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7491 Grandpa Thu, 16 Aug 2007 03:20:02 +0000 http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7491 Chris, You and your entire family are in our thoughts and minds. Feel good for all of the blessings you have from your grandfather and do your best to help your grandmother because she will really need it and not know it. We love you, stay strong. Hal Chris,

You and your entire family are in our thoughts and minds. Feel good for all of the blessings you have from your grandfather and do your best to help your grandmother because she will really need it and not know it.

We love you, stay strong.

Hal

]]> By: Jessica http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7479 Jessica Wed, 15 Aug 2007 18:07:05 +0000 http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7479 I want to say how deeply sorry I am for your loss. I can tell that you love your grandfather very much and letting go of him in this life on earth cannot be an easy task. But... Chris, you touched on something supremely important and that is that you had yet to lose someone in your family until now. Ironically, I was speaking with a friend last night and we had both lost our fathers at relatively early ages. We were saying that, until that point of losing a parent it seemed an insurmountable suffering. I thought for sure that I would fall apart into a pile of sand and let the wind carry me away if that ever happened. Yet... I didn't. I kept breathing, sometimes between sobs, and pushed ahead. I went to the gas station, grocery store...out to dinner...I went to school... And... What I think was the biggest blessing in my life as far as that goes is now knowing that, one of the worst things imaginable, losing someone you love--well, Chris, you CAN handle it. Through faith, through the love of your family, through the support of friends, and through those precious treasured memories of the two blasting televisions. What an immensely important gift your grandfather has bestowed upon you at this point in your life!! He has shown you your own strength, the strength to overcome such loss and how to grieve and live (i.e. walmart with the caffeine free diet pepsi and orange slices)at the same time. That, Chris, is a lesson you will never forget for as long as you live... Blessings, Chris, upon you and your family in this time of grief. You know I am always here for you. I want to say how deeply sorry I am for your loss. I can tell that you love your grandfather very much and letting go of him in this life on earth cannot be an easy task.

But…

Chris, you touched on something supremely important and that is that you had yet to lose someone in your family until now.
Ironically, I was speaking with a friend last night and we had both lost our fathers at relatively early ages. We were saying that, until that point of losing a parent it seemed an insurmountable suffering. I thought for sure that I would fall apart into a pile of sand and let the wind carry me away if that ever happened.

Yet…

I didn’t. I kept breathing, sometimes between sobs, and pushed ahead. I went to the gas station, grocery store…out to dinner…I went to school…

And…

What I think was the biggest blessing in my life as far as that goes is now knowing that, one of the worst things imaginable, losing someone you love–well, Chris, you CAN handle it. Through faith, through the love of your family, through the support of friends, and through those precious treasured memories of the two blasting televisions.

What an immensely important gift your grandfather has bestowed upon you at this point in your life!! He has shown you your own strength, the strength to overcome such loss and how to grieve and live (i.e. walmart with the caffeine free diet pepsi and orange slices)at the same time. That, Chris, is a lesson you will never forget for as long as you live…

Blessings, Chris, upon you and your family in this time of grief. You know I am always here for you.

]]> By: valerie http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7478 valerie Wed, 15 Aug 2007 17:00:37 +0000 http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7478 I am truly sorry to hear this and I will keep you all in my prayers. Like Becca said, it is great you had the thirty years with him that you did, that is a real blessing. It's wonderful that he got to see you grow, get married, and see your children and I know that you all made him very happy. There's not much anyone can say at a time like this, but I hope that you are comforted in knowing he's in heaven, waiting for you. Thinking of you! I am truly sorry to hear this and I will keep you all in my prayers. Like Becca said, it is great you had the thirty years with him that you did, that is a real blessing. It’s wonderful that he got to see you grow, get married, and see your children and I know that you all made him very happy.
There’s not much anyone can say at a time like this, but I hope that you are comforted in knowing he’s in heaven, waiting for you.
Thinking of you!

]]> By: Becca http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7477 Becca Wed, 15 Aug 2007 15:24:06 +0000 http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7477 Death is a very hard thing to deal with, and I know that you will miss your grandpa, but I think you are very lucky--as you have said, both to have had 30 years with him in the first place and to be able to have some peace about his passing now. I think too that he was a very lucky man to be able to be surrounded by loved ones. Chris, you are also surrounded by loved ones. I don't know if words give you any comfort right now, but we love you and are thinking of you even when we can't physically be near, and you know if you ever need us we will be there. Death is a very hard thing to deal with, and I know that you will miss your grandpa, but I think you are very lucky–as you have said, both to have had 30 years with him in the first place and to be able to have some peace about his passing now. I think too that he was a very lucky man to be able to be surrounded by loved ones. Chris, you are also surrounded by loved ones. I don’t know if words give you any comfort right now, but we love you and are thinking of you even when we can’t physically be near, and you know if you ever need us we will be there.

]]> By: Cindy Laughead http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7476 Cindy Laughead Wed, 15 Aug 2007 15:17:43 +0000 http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7476 Losing anyone is hard but losing the first one in your life can be especially difficult. When I lost Joe, I remember feeling numb. I forgot things and did not do so well at things that I normally do without a thought. I did see a grief counselor and it helped a lot. I think the most important thing I discovered is it is ok to grieve. It is not a sign of weakness but a sign that you loved that person very much. The thing that sustained me the most was my understanding the Plan of Happiness that we learn about from our Heavenly Father. There really is a plan and we are all a part of it. Losing people we love is part of that plan and gives those people an opportunity to continuing growing that they would never have had while on this earth. I guess the greatest thing I learned was that it is ok. Everything is part of the plan and although it is hard to see at the time, there are blessings that we receive from all that happens to us. The key for me was to know that and be at peace with losing my boy. Give yourself time to grieve, remember your grandpa, and know that Heavenly Father loves you and wants you to be happy. It is possible to feel happiness again and know that all is well. You and your family will be in our prayers. Losing anyone is hard but losing the first one in your life can be especially difficult. When I lost Joe, I remember feeling numb. I forgot things and did not do so well at things that I normally do without a thought. I did see a grief counselor and it helped a lot. I think the most important thing I discovered is it is ok to grieve. It is not a sign of weakness but a sign that you loved that person very much. The thing that sustained me the most was my understanding the Plan of Happiness that we learn about from our Heavenly Father. There really is a plan and we are all a part of it. Losing people we love is part of that plan and gives those people an opportunity to continuing growing that they would never have had while on this earth. I guess the greatest thing I learned was that it is ok. Everything is part of the plan and although it is hard to see at the time, there are blessings that we receive from all that happens to us. The key for me was to know that and be at peace with losing my boy. Give yourself time to grieve, remember your grandpa, and know that Heavenly Father loves you and wants you to be happy. It is possible to feel happiness again and know that all is well. You and your family will be in our prayers.

]]> By: Lisa http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7472 Lisa Wed, 15 Aug 2007 14:39:41 +0000 http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7472 You are lucky to know that you will see him again. Lots of people who lose a loved one think that's the end. As time passes, the sadness will fade a little and you will think of him and be able to be happy. You are lucky to know that you will see him again. Lots of people who lose a loved one think that’s the end. As time passes, the sadness will fade a little and you will think of him and be able to be happy.

]]> By: Mike Laughead http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7468 Mike Laughead Wed, 15 Aug 2007 13:37:14 +0000 http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7468 I'm sorry about your grandfather dying Chris. I hope that you and everyone in your family is okay. Especially your grandmother. If you need to talk to someone please give me a call or talk to my Mom, she knows where anyone is coming from when they are dealing with death. I’m sorry about your grandfather dying Chris. I hope that you and everyone in your family is okay. Especially your grandmother. If you need to talk to someone please give me a call or talk to my Mom, she knows where anyone is coming from when they are dealing with death.

]]> By: Kate http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7460 Kate Wed, 15 Aug 2007 06:48:41 +0000 http://www.chrisandkatewheeler.com/2007/08/15/my-grandfather-is-gone/#comment-7460 He was a funny, ornery, light-hearted, and kind man. You are lucky to have him as a grandfather and I feel very blessed to have known him. He will be very missed... He was a funny, ornery, light-hearted, and kind man. You are lucky to have him as a grandfather and I feel very blessed to have known him. He will be very missed…

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